Well, last night was interesting. My wife and a few of our friends decided a couple of weeks ago that they wanted to go to a drag show in Greensboro. I couldn’t understand why she wanted me to go because it didn’t sound like my type of thing, but I went anyway because she wanted me to go and I’ve never went to one before so who knows, it might be fun!

So we meet our friends at Natty Greene’s for dinner. The waitress forgot to put our order in so we sat there for 50 minutes without getting our food while 2 other 4-tops came, ate, and left. The worst thing was, she LIED to us about what happened! She came out after about 30 minutes and another table who arrived after us had already received their food. She said that there was a problem with a burger that one of us had ordered so they needed to remake it…20 minutes later, still no food.

One of our people got up to go speak with the manager. The manager said he’d take care of it and before our friend got back to the table, the food was coming out. The manager came over and told us that he had comped all of our beers and drinks because the waitress had forgotten to put our order in until 30 minutes after we had ordered. I was happy to have gotten my Jameson & Ginger for free, though I wished at that point that I had had a few more haha! Sadly, this wasn’t the only shortcoming at dinner.

As soon as the waitress brought my fish and chips to the table, I could smell that putrid smell, that “seafood smell”, that fish gets after it’s been dead for too long and has too much bacteria on it at that point. My stomach turned, but I’ve had “fishy” smelling fish before that was just farm raised and didn’t smell great, but tasted fine…so I gave the catfish a shot anyway. I took a bite of the fish and not only was it going bad, but the breading was soggy as hell! The chips turned out to be the same. So really, my meal consisted of cole slaw that was actually delicious and a Jameson and Ginger.

I asked the waitress to bring the manager over about the food and I let him know what was going on. He shook his head in embarrassment and said that he was very sorry, that this experience was not their standard, and that he hoped we would return to let them make it up to us. He comped my meal so we ended up walking away paying $7 for cheese fries.

At this point, we were all ready to just go have some fun so we headed down the street to the venue for the drag show. What do we see across the street from the venue, you ask? Why only a group of protesters talking about the sin of homosexuality and condemning us all for going to a drag show…really? I mean, there were a lot of straight people there too. It’s entertainment. It’s not a big gay orgy. But whatever, free country, right? (There should be a sarcasm button).

We went inside the venue and I realized that this was the old “N Club”; a place where 18 yr old girls could go in and get hit on by creepy 30+ yr old men. I know because I had been a few times when I was in college and always thought, “guys, why are we here?” Anyway, the ground was still sticky with spilled fru-fru drinks from the clubbing days, but I’m happy to say that they were able to eradicate the smell of vomit, creepy guy cologne, and jizz so that the show could be enjoyable.

Ryan and Matt

Anyway, the drag queens…OH the drag queens  lol! Some of them were funny, some were artsy, some were just really fucking weird. There was a Dolly Parton drag queen that was clowning around. She has HUGE fake boobs that she flaunted around with her silver tassels hanging off of them and her ridiculously huge blonde wig. She was one of my favorites because she was just trying to make people laugh, and she did a good job.

Workin hard for the money

Then there was another drag queen that came out in a dress made of trash bags, took the dress off and was in a bikini made of plastic shopping bags…what the mother fuck? As Gunnery Sgt Hartman says in Full Metal Jacket, “you’re so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece.” That’s what I thought of when she came out wearing that crazy get-up. Someone else came out with a puppet on her hand and she was really funny, I think her name was Trixie. Obviously, I like the ones who act like they don’t take themselves seriously more so than the others. The hostess, I think, was the best part of the show. She was hilarious and had a great personality.

Trixie Mattel

Throughout the show I stayed true to my favorite drink with Jameson and Ginger (although I prefer other Irish whiskeys), and tabbed out after 3. However, one of our friends kept bringing me more of them after he started drinking them and tasted how delicious they were. So I probably ended up drinking between 8 and 10 of them before the show was over and I must say, I enjoyed myself much more because of it!

All in all, we had a great time at a show in which I didn’t think I’d have any interest. It just goes to show that just about anything can turn out to be a great time as long as you’re with great friends and people you love.

Matt, Terry, and I



The wife and I

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